(Syria) 3/2 Tuesday 8:34pm 2015:
Our family is depressed. Because of threats! And mother is thinking of leaving soon if it gets worse.
(Leaving from Syria) 4/2 Wednesday 2:44pm 2015:
We all have to leave! Mother's big, bright, oily eyes are like a flowing river of silent tears! I have to be strong, I'm on the verge of tears but I need to stay strong for my family!
(I don't know) 7/2 Saturday 2:27am 2015:
We have been walking for days! On this sandy, dusty path and I am getting a rush where my hijab is rubbing on my soft, bay, fragil forhead. I can't live much longer, I'm suffering and my family are to.
(In their middle of nowhere) 8/2 Sunday 6:09 am 2015:
Mohammed's lips look like a sandy desert and his petite, boney, dirty face looks like a sandstorm in that desert. I think he's the one that's suffering the most.
(By seaside) 9/2 Monday 4:16am 2015:
Father has been using a compass to find the sea, to get onto a boat! We have made it! I'v got to go, were boarding our boat!
(On sea) 10/2 Tuesday 12:34am 2015:
Mothers eyes are none stop! I'v been trying and trying to calm her down, I give up!
(On sea) 11/2 Wednesday 6:04pm 2015:
I'm sea sick in two ways! First I'm feeling sick, second I'm sick of the sea!
(Some country) 12/2 Thursday 5:23am 2015:
We've rocked up to a sand dune! We are saved! Our lives are not in danger! We are now on our way to a refugee camp!
(On our way to New Zealand) 13/2 Friday 1:54pm 2015;
We are being "shipped" to New Zealand! So exciting!
(New Zealand) 16/2 Monday 5:04pm 2015:
We've made it safe 'n sound to New Zealand and have seen many kids my age! I'm going to make a heaps of friends!
(New Zealand) 17/2 Tuesday 12:35pm 2015:
I wish what I said last was true! Kids of New Zealand come up to the fence of the refugee camp and laugh! I wish they knew I was just like them!
(New Zealand) 18/2 Wednesday 3:09pm 2015:
I'v made a friend (Sarah) she always waits by the fence for me in the morning, she's a lovely person!
(New Zealand) 19/2 Thursday 6:43pm 2015:
I wish all kids knew what it is like, and they could understand me, but then I think no one should go through what I went through!
The end
Tuesday, June 27, 2017
3 comments:
To support my learning I ask you to comment as follows:
1. Something positive - something you like about what I have shared.
2. Thoughtful - A sentence to let us know you actually read/watched or listened to what I had to say
3. Something thoughtful - how have you connected with my learning? Give me some ideas for next time or ask me a question.
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Hello Laura,
ReplyDeleteIt's Hayley.
I think your story is written out really well!
I love the idea of adding times and dates, I makes the story easier to read and add's interest.
I think that next time you could check your spelling and make longer paragraphs.
Thank you Hayley!
DeleteHayley, your post is really clear and offers some constructive feedback. Well done and thank you for sharing.
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